Why God Made Moms

I know this has been floating around for quite some time and I first read it as a teacher and not as a mother. This weekend I received it from someone and read it for the first time as a mother. It is even more amusing now!

WHY GOD MADE MOMS

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's mom like me.

What kind of a little girl was your mom?
1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms and dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine..

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.


I cannot wait until I get to hear all of the funny things W says. I enjoy spending my days with my students as they often make me laugh, but it will be so wonderful to hear my own son come up with things like these! For now I enjoy his smiles, giggles, and squeals because before I know it these days will be gone and he will find his voice. Then I will be living in my own edition of the funny things kids say!

A to Z Challenge: V is for Voice.

V is a letter I struggled with as there wasn't a baby product that immediately came to mind to review or discuss. Two words did come to mind and they are vision and voice. I took some time to think about these two words as they relate to motherhood and decided that V is for Voice.

When I say voice, I mean the voice I want to have as a mother. I often think about how I come across as a mother to the people around me. There is one area that comes immediately to my mind when I think about it and it is the way I chose to handle the medical care for my pregnancy and birth.

I know many people in my life perceived me as a little strange based solely on the fact that I chose to use a midwife and have a med-free, water birth. In fact, I didn't talk about my choice with too many people during my pregnancy unless they brought it up. I got tired of feeling like I had to defend my decision. I also got tired of hearing people make comments like, "Good luck with that," and asking questions like, "Well, you can always get an epidural if you need one, right?" The fact was that no, I couldn't have gotten an epidural unless I was transferred to the hospital. Plus, I never even wanted one. Many people also asked me all about the risks and what would happen if W or I needed help. I think they thought I was going to give birth out in the woods or something. Sorry, but I'm not quite that natural.

Now that I had a successful experience, I try and speak to people about it as much as possible. One thing I never understood about being pregnant was why so many women seemed to want to tell me their horror stories. To combat this I am determined to share my positive birth experience with any woman who will listen. That is the voice I want to be.